Posts Tagged ‘ Our past ’

Families and how to survive them

January 13, 2012
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200px-Familiesandhowto

This book has been a favorite of mine for more than a decade. So much so that when I realized I had lost it, I bought it again. It now resides safely in my kindle, this time immune to a future move. Families and how to survive them has been written in a dialogue form between a shrink (Robin Skynner), and an actor (John Cleese, yes the Monthy Python one). It’s mainly about, well, families. From how – and why – people fall in love, to how love relationships work – or not -, and what happens when the children...

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I want to feel better

January 7, 2012
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The festive season is a time for celebration, love, family gatherings, and sharing mountains of food we later regret. I am no exception. Especially for the food part. Christmas is also the moment of the year I chose to see my father. He abused me for most of my childhood, ignored me since I’m grown up. Each reunion teaches me the profound sense of the word “ambivalence”: I feel a mixture of love, pity, anger, fear, and flat out revulsion. I know the guy is insane, and that it’s probably not his fault. But it does not change my...

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Shame is your enemy

January 5, 2012
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depression teen girl cried

I don’t remember when I first read “shame based personnality”, but I recognized it instantly: hell, it was me. Shame was my constant companion. I was always feeling it, about one thing or the other. Being late brought shame. Being early triggered shame as well. Doing something badly brought shame (you cannot get anything right type of shame), doing it well brought shame (who do you think your are type of shame). Wanting attention brought shame, but acting withdrawn as well. My desires and wants were shameful by definition. Even falling in love triggered shame. Oh God it was...

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